He Chose MANCITY OVER ME!!!

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Who can resist me? Seriously. Especially when I put my mind to it and decide to focus my charms on you? I'm delightful, charming, well spoken and interesting to the extent that you can give up what you are doing to spend time with me. In fact, if you visit me in the morning, don't expect to leave in 30 minutes because you'll be enthralled by my voice and bewitched. When we speak on the phone, you don't want to ever let go because my voice hypnotises you and makes you think only good thoughts. 

Well, that was what I thought until MI (My Intended) brought me to the ground on Saturday! This was however in December, 2014. Not a joke. What happened? I had just finished cooking; my mum, two sisters and their husbands, including my nephews were around so it was a full house and I had just prepared a good meal (if I may say so myself). We talked about the pros and cons of MI and I living on the Lagos Island as opposed to living on the main island. Presently, he lives on the main land and works on the Island. I haven't moved yet and we are house hunting, looking at areas like Surulere, Yaba, Ikeja etc.

Anyways, because of the gist with my folks, I come de ginger and when he called me that evening, I launched into my opening address on why we should get a house on the island (To be honest, I was initially afraid of the whole "island" thing. What if waves of water crash on the island- I can't swim! Laugh at me o! The first time I visited Lagos was barely two years ago or so). When I began to think of that 3rd mainland bridge and the traffic! I almost had a heart attack. Personal opinion- I feel like people in Lagos are zombies; that’s why they party hard! (Don’t shoot me o). I mean in Abuja, there may be traffic but when it is up to 15 minutes, I lose the patience. Hian! For instance, MI leaves Surulere for work at 6.30 am (sometimes 6.00am) and then gets to work on the island between 8.00am to 8.30am, sometimes 8.45am. If the traffic is bad or it's a rainy day, sometimes by 9.00am or a few minutes after 9.00am. When he closes at 5.00am, he gets home between 7.00pm and 8.00pm. That is like travelling from Abuja to Lokoja o! My house is far from my place of work but most times I spend 45 minutes to get to work. Presently, where I stay, it takes about 25 minutes. The thought of Lagos Traffic is not funny o! My heart actually beats faster.

It was with these thoughts in my mind that I began to talk about the house search matter. Of course, being the man that he is, he began to talk about the CONS of getting a house on the island.  “It's expensive, We can't give a landlord that kind of money for a 2 bedroom apartment in Ikoyi, I want to comfortably pay for the next rent without issues, you'll get home before me if we live in Surulere or Yaba since your office will be in Ikoyi, You won’t have to go through the 3^rd mainland bridge...”

Should I go on?

I knew this was a sensitive issue because MI usually listens (except when he's being stubborn) and he wasn’t listening so I decided to try another angle/approach so I could make my point. No sooner had I started than he interrupted by saying, "Please, can we talk about this later? I want to watch a match" Osanobua! I asked him, "Eh? What did you say?" He repeated it that he wanted to watch a Mancity game. I'm finished. See, if he had just said we should talk about it later, maybe I would have let it slide but for a game? When I'm talking about a future house? Kai! The line went off and he didn't call back. Hian! Unlike him so I called back. His other love (mancity) had consumed him so he barely listened. I was like, what happened? He said he thought I cut the call. So why didn't you call back? He was like he thought I wanted him to watch the game. You’re choosing a game over me?

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You know me. I just began to say, "Ok, if you think that is the best thing to do when I'm talking about our house and what is top priority to me, go ahead". You know that make-him-feel-bad reverse psychology thing. It didn't work o! HE just said, "Alright, thanks babe. Talk to you later. Kisses" and cut the call!

I was shocked! I had to call back. I could tell his attention was divided. I was like, so you cut the call on me? He said no, he thought the conversation was over. I was like, that was meant to make you feel bad and allow me talk. If it was to air his own reasons for not wanting a house on the island, the game had not started so it was not a problem; now I want to give my reasons, Mancity has started so he has to go. So why did you call me to talk about this if it wasn't convenient? He was like, “Sorry, I should have called later”. Woh, I was fighting a losing battle so I freed him and went about my business.

When the match was over, he called back severally. Unfortunately (not deliberately), my phone was in the room so I didn't see the calls until when I retired for bed. I smirked sha because he thought I was angry. When I asked him the next day who won the match, he couldn't even say it was Mancity, he just talked around it and I let it slide.

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So MI chose Mancity over me o! Funny enough, we watch matches together although I'm not a football fanatic like my friend Wanter! That girl is crazy. She should become a Manchester United Coach! Since MI loves Barca as well, I will not bring up weighty discussions when Barca or Mancity are playing. That is my creed! I have heard of men whose sense of reasoning flies out the window when a match is on.; forgetting/skipping important events etc. That can never be my portion o!

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Also, I hope when I'm doing my natural hair things and he wants to bring up weighty stuff, he will understand when I say let's talk about this later. Who am I kidding? MI's blood doesn't get hot like mine. So it's likely he won't even bring the matter up when I'm busy.

On the house matter...hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. It's like I may be on my own on this one. I understand where he's coming from and I'm open to checking out houses over there but let me tell you, I don't want a place where the gutter is brimming to black madness o! Come to think of it, even on the Island, I never saw an empty gutter! Between you and me, I think he will win this fight but not the war. Lol!

So tell me, is the traffic terrible where you are and how do you cope especially if you are based in Lagos? And has this kind of thing happened to you before?

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