YESTERDAY'S ASHES

I meet him while I am waiting for the bus going to Mpape.

He is driving a sleek Mercedes GL450 SUV with tinted windows. He honks once, twice and then I look up and turn to my  right. Is he waiting for me?

I ignore him and keep waiting for a bus. When he's tired, he'll leave but no, he reverses and stops right in front of me.

Smoothly his window rolls down.

"Hello"

"Hello" I say.

"Can I drop you off somewhere?"

"No, don't bother" I return.

"It's getting late and the road is dark" He nods at the non-functioning traffic lights that look like long poles, "I don't think it's safe for you to be out here at this time"

" And you are safer?" I can't help the comeback.

He smiles and I see what I shouldn't see. A man I can trust. His eyes look warm and deep. Against my better judgement, I say, "I'm going to Mpape"

"Hmmm, I'm on my way to Maitama. Perhaps I can take you to..."

"Nicon Junction" We both say at the same time. I smile uncertainly. His smile is tight.

I nod and get in, logging in my bag and sweater.

"Are you cold?" He asks.

No, my office is usually very cold"

"Oh" 

And we both fall silent.

He drives for a while and then says, "My name is Ezekiel"

It sounds odd. My mind goes to him and a woman rolling in between sheets and the lady moaning his name. I snort. Will she be saying "Ezzy, Ezzy" or what?

I can see that my snort catches his attention and he throws me a glance from the corner of his eye. I straighten up immediately. I shouldn't be laughing at his name. It's a good name. It means he must be a good christian.

We are on the express way now and his car is really really smooth; I enjoy the ride. Like a cat I snuggle in my seat and let out a sigh. "You have a great car"

"A pleasure to meet you too, You-Have-A-Great-Car"

He laughs. I smile a little.

"What's your name?"

"Habiba"

"I like your name, " He says. I nod my thanks.

We get to some traffic and we watch as a ruckus starts in front of us.

He mutters, " I should go out and even out this traffic" he says.

"No" I quickly say. He glances at me in surprise. "Why?"

"Because, you'll leave the key in ignition and someone can slide in and take over your car while you're out or you may accuse me of stealing something from your car" I say in a rush.

He looks at me with a confused frown and from nowhere, bursts into laughter. A whole, hearty, rich laughter. 

"I didn't see that coming." he says, wiping his eyes. "I think I needed that. I had a shitty day"

And that's when I fall in love with him. But I don't know that yet, do I?

"Well, none of that is going to happen but I'll stay here with you since you are so afraid." 

I relax back into my seat and we watch the traffic try to even out before we find a tiny way out and make a run for it- we spend about 20 minutes there. And that's when we start talking. Really talking.

He's a business consultant and works for a firm Norton & Newton. He lives in Maitama and loves to watch movies as I do and listens to classical music. I can see he has a lean frame in the white shirt he's in. His hair is clean shaven and his skin smells of pampered wealth but those eyes are eyes of a man who knows things, been through things and became stronger through the things he suffered. Where did I hear that from?

He learned obedience through the things he suffered. Hmmmm.

When we get to Nicon Junction, we are still engrossed in the state of the country- thank God for the newspapers and the Over-sabi supervisor who always leaves the channel on CNN when the Directors are around. I sound knowledgeable even to myself. Goodness, I didn't know my mind put away all these bits and pieces of information. I hold my breath and let it out when he goes past the Nicon Junction. I don't even know I'm holding it in.

I look at him.

His eyes flick over to me and swiftly face the road again. "I think I should drop you off at home if you don't mind"

I nod. I can't speak. Oh oh, these are the kind of men Mum warns me about- the kind of man my father was and still is. Once the air gets too thick and you can't breathe, that's the signal to disappear. I never had this happen so fast. I remember the thought I had of him and a lady in between sheets and the faceless woman takes a face- mine. I shake my head hoping it will shake my mind.

Take into captivity every thought...

I shake my head again as if to dispel the thoughts. I better be careful here.

I look at his left hand and I see no ring. Hmmm, but that does not mean anything. Many married men don't wear rings.

"You look like you're struggling" he says."Something wrong?"

"No" I say. "Just thought about something; sorry,what were you saying?"

And we start to talk about something else as we drive into Mpape. I direct him until we get to my house. It's already 7.30pm but it's already dark and there's no electricity. Oh well, darkness it is. I don't have money to buy fuel this night for the generator.

"This is it?" he says as his light beams on the gate.

"This is it. Thank you" I try to unfasten my seat belt but it gets stuck and I tug at it, almost desperately. I need to leave this place.

"Hold on. Let me give you a hand" he says but there''s a smile in his voice. When his hand reaches mine, I automatically pull away. The sizzling, crackling current that shoots within me is worthy of being on TV. He looks at me and mutters, "Some chemistry" Or I guess that's what I think he muttered. He frees me from the seat and I  quickly open the door and get down. As I shut the door and turn to thank him for the ride, I'm left speechless as he comes down too and walks towards the gate.

"I'll prefer it if I see you safely through your gate"He explains with a shrug.

"You can do that from the confines of your car" I say.

He smiles broadly. "You are one refreshing young girl, do you know that?"

I almost stumble. I am floored but quickly regain my composure and say nothing.

"Do you have a generator?" he asks with serious calm.

"Yes, I do"

"You want me to help you put it on before I leave?"

"No" I say defiantly and more quickly than I  want to.

He nods. "Alright, Habiba. Thank you for a wonderful conversation"

"Thank you for a wonderful ride, Ezekiel"

We both innately and instinctively agree not to shake hands and I get into my compound and, letting out the breath I have obviously been holding in! That's some mini-god on two feet.

You shall serve no other god but Me

Oh, Common! I'm just saying. If you don't want me saying that, don't make such a fine gorgeous specimen!

I realise that we didn't exchange numbers or contact details. Oh well, it's just as well. I use my key to enter into the house. My brother, Sister and Mum have gone to church from what I've seen. Some funny church that I don't like. 

I check the Jerry-can and see there's no fuel. I check the tank and I see there's nothing there either. The rechargeable lantern is out of battery life and my phone is almost dead. 

Oh well, what a day!

I quickly make Eba for my family and warm the soup. I don't feel like eating. I wish I had a cold drink and a biscuit. But I can't go out now so I get ready to pull off my clothes and manage a bath without light when I hear the honk of a horn at the gate. Once, twice, thrice and then a fourth time. Ok, someone's knocking at my gate now.

I quickly rush outside to open the gate since I locked it from inside and I don't want Mum giving me a history of my birth and such. When I open the gate, I find that I am face to face with Ezekiel. The headlights of his car are on and so he looks like an angel- an angel holding a 20 litre container of Petrol!

"Don't say no but I figured having extra fuel isn't a bad idea" He says with a smile.

He goes past me and puts it at my veranda and then gives me such an intense look,I cannot say a word even if I try. He actually got me fuel. Of all the things in the world. I wish I can hug him. I think I fall in love with with him again at this point- but of course, I didn't know that yet.

"I'll see you again" He says, arresting me with his eyes and I stand helplessly beneath the onslaught of feeling radiating from somewhere deeep within him. "you have my Can"

And then he leaves, his headlights becoming faint as I shut the gate and pour the fuel into the generator. As I switch it on and move to the change over amidst the roaring of the generator, I hug myself. This is so surreal. I will see him again. Until then...

I  bring down the Change Over Switch.

Let There Be Light.

To be Continued