Courtesy: tolet.com https://www.tolet.com.ng/blog/lagos-hustle-and-the-night-bus/ |
Today I am reading through all my work thus
far on my blog. My blog that I had abandoned.
What happened to me? I have no idea.
NO, scratch that, I do.
Lagos
Life
Marriage
Work
Lagos
Work
Lagos
Work
Lagos
Work
Happened.
I had not looked at my blog in over a year. I just did not have the zeal to look at it, thinking I wasn’t such a
great writer like my Sister, Olivia Oyibo (the babe is mean) or my friends, Adesuwa and Ella. They always had something to write and write they did.
I always had something to write but write I
did not.
Marriage did not take that away from me; no-
I know I had the support I wanted if I sought it from Husbandman. I just got
tired of the hustle in Lagos. Lagos made me search myself and Lagos almost made
me give up on myself.
I had to get up 6.00am in the morning or
5.30am to get to work for 8.00am. Getting to work is an ordeal when you can't afford to take a cab. Too many people pushing you in the BRT;you're standing and inhaling someone's underarm, no not underarm- armpit ordour(pronounce as Ohdooough) because he's taller than you are and has to hold on to the rail to keep steady in the moving vehicle. People everywhere and rude people too. Ticket girl is rude, driver is rude, people commuting to work, rude. You stay at work until 6.00pm or 7.00pm or
8.00pm or 9.00pm and get home between 9.00pm and 10.30pm. Sometimes 11.00pm. When you're not in an Uber, you still meet rude people with smelly, sweaty bodies that if you're wearing a sleeveless dress, you have to wrap yourself with a Pashmina. If Traffic will not keep you, work will keep you;If work doesn't keep you, the fight on the road between vehicle owners and danfo drivers will keep you. You’re
too tired to go beyond the perfunctory hello to the peeps at home and then
sleep and the same cycle begins again for a week.
The weekend? You don’t have a washing
machine so you have to wash with your hands; you have to go to the gym for an
hour and a half and then you have to go to the market and start cooking. You
have to make time for some friends who think you don’t have their time anymore
and then kiss those friends who understand why you are no longer available. Your
Saturdays pass by in a blur and you’re left with Sunday. Sometimes you go to
church, sometimes you don’t. There’s no energy. You cook because there are
those who have to eat on Sundays and you either go to the gym or go for house fellowship.
You tell yourself to sleep three hours on
Sunday afternoon or you go to bed an hour or two early but then you wake up on
Monday, well slept but not well rested. No escape, no respite- Hustle, Hustle, Hustle!!!
You used to love having guests around you
but Lagos makes you dread people visiting because you just want your own time
to do your own thing- which is nothing really-just staring into space, not
dreaming like you used to…just worrying.
Then the times you try to go on Instagram,
you see people who seem make Lagos seem like a breeze. They have an 8-4 or 8-5 job, or are bold enough to do their own thing; they’re mobile so they can afford to leap
from one location to the other. They are either hustling on their own, branding
for people or showcasing their designs on what dress they recently made etc. And
you wonder if it’s not the same Lagos that seems to be zapping away at your
energy. You can’t wake up to pray; the bible becomes boring; you are
spiritually lethargic and wondering if God ever really loved you in the first
place.
Cooking just doesn’t give you the solace anymore;
you’re too tired to write; you’re too tired to read; you don’t bother with
taking care of your hair anymore. Your body tells you, you can’t eat your cake
and have it but you plod through everyday believing you’ll have enough rest
this Saturday to pursue your own dreams.
Achenyo, Back to earth!
It ain’t gonna happen until you make time
for it. I read something short on "Why won't you be depressed?" Ife-Grace Dada wrote on Facebook in February this year on learning to say No. I have heard it a million times but maybe I needed to
see it from her- There is nothing wrong with saying No so you can pursue your
passions.Or No, so you can recharge, nothing wrong in saying I really need that lunch hour break and have
my quiet time.
I think I am gradually having the awareness or realisation that I came to Lagos
to enroll in a practical school about life. So far, the city’s been winning. I
haven’t mastered the art of riding this town (more like galloping) the way others have but…your new
year was January 1, 2017? My new year began February 1 2017. My resolution? This town will not kill
me.
You remember when I said earlier that I
didn’t think I was a good enough writer? So what? Do I have the passion to do
this and get better? That’s when we should start talking. The difference
between myself and Olivia Oyibo, Ella, Adesuwa and Lady Gabby is that that they
had something to write and boy, they did.
I will not be overweight in this town;
I will not be exhausted to the point of
uselessness in this town
I will not be passionless to the point of
wastefulness in this town.
I shall take baby steps until I become what
I should be, here or anywhere else.
Thank you Mercy and Grace for recently
telling me to go back and read my writings (thanks Grace) or that you’re not
worried for me, I can make it (thank you Mercy). Thanks MI for reminding me to put something down today.
Oh yeah, and to everyone else as well…
Lagos will not kill me.
Hmmmmm
ReplyDeleteOga O! I hail Sir! It's a real Hmmmmm!!!
ReplyDeleteYipeeee!!! Welcome, I have been a little worried for you. You just disappeared after your wedding.. Lagos can't kill you at all oh.. It can't happen. Welcome back sweety..
ReplyDeleteLOL!!! Thank you so so much Gabby! Amen o! Amen!
DeleteFinally, she's back!!! We've missed you gannn. lol.Happy New Year!! Yessooo Lagos will not kill you. It can't. I can relate with you on the stress of Lag having spent 18+ years there and living in different parts of the city. I am now happily just an occasional visitor to Lag.
ReplyDeleteYou will find your balance and master the city and its stress.
Good read dear, welcome back and please stay :*
LOL!!!! Like indeed! Been drinking in your blog posts again.
DeleteAmen and since you asked, I'll try to stay. Lol!!!